Heart Attacks and Goals

I'm drained. I'm tired. I'm stressed. My stress level has been high as of late and nothing much I can do about it right now. I've been going to bed at a reasonable time. And I've been eating. Lots. I keep trying to lose weight again and am just met with a stagnant scale. Yes, I know that the scale is not the be-all end-all of health. But I also haven't been moving while I let that foot heal. I now have dispensation to get back to walking as usual but haven't managed to get my butt either on the treadmill or outside. So that ain't increased muscle weight! I thought I was doing so well as of last week where I was below 180. The last two days have been over 185. And I know why. Only I put the food in my mouth. I'm stressed. I hurt. I'm tired. I'm going off the deep end. Those all combine into a nasty mix of hunger for all things edible. Not a good thing.

I went for a week without my diet sodas with no problems and replaced them with tea (granted, I was sick the entire time, but I did make the swap). I am hoping that by continuing that absence I will have less sugar and general food cravings. Besides, I can spend the money I would have spent on soda toward good tea. So far, no change in cravings that I can tell, but I am willing to give it time and hope for the best. And if not, more tea money.

In other news, this little pain in the arse gave me a heart attack yesterday.

The Smug Ruler of His World

Bedtime rolled around and I told Link that it was time to go outside. He didn't move. I petted his belly. Nothing, but it felt cold. My heart stopped. I shoved his body back and forth and talked to him in a panic. The pest then opened one eye at me. He had been asleep. Still in a state of fear I checked him over as he got up, yawned, stretched, and sat by the door ready to go for his nightly duties. I was dumbfounded. He seemed unharmed. Just sleepy. Okay. Fine. Pardon me while I try to get my heart rate and emotions back to a steady state.

So I take him out on his leash, as usual. I check one side of the house for Mr. Le Pew and let Link off the leash to go do his duties. And get a whiff of eau de skunk. Dangit. I should have checked BOTH sides of the house before letting him loose. Luckily it was only a minor spray, but still skunked. I mixed up the peroxide (which may have been old so I might need another round tonight), Dawn, and baking soda and off we went to the shower. Not how I had planned on spending part of the night, but I'll take a skunk any day in comparison to how I thought the night was going to end. And I'm back in tears just thinking about how it very well could have ended. 

It was a long night. He's been waking me up several times at night lately to get up and do his business. At first I thought he was faking it (and sometimes he is--he's crafty like that) but after seeing his needs I stopped getting frustrated and just grumble as I get up to keep him from having accidents in the house. I'd rather get up needlessly than clean up excrement. He's becoming an old man. I love him. He'll turn 11 in January. I do indeed love that old man and I'll be happy to have him here as long as he wants to be here.  

And now I'm in tears again. Dang dog. Giving me a heart attack. The Nerve!