Maybe Next Time

I might nix the internet from my vacations, like I do when I go camping. Yeah, yeah, I'm writing this on an internet connection while watching videos online, but somehow I wonder if I should hold internet necessities next time. Granted, my people would worry about me then. Of course, they worry about me when I try to become a burrito for a bear too. Yet I really like the ability to peruse YouTube while I type blog entries.

 

Link has mastered the Netflix-and-Chill mentality

Heck, I even have phone service here!

Next time will be out to the west of the state instead of east/central unless something else pops up, also with internet, but no cell coverage, which does feel a little more freeing while allowing myself to use or not use digital devices. A couple times today I just put everything down and drank my tea outside, dog sniffing around me for scraps and pettins. The hikes where I silence the phone (but still take it because I'm not stupid and might need it). The cooking without eating out (though that isn't really unusual for me on my own, just when I am up with the parents). But that is for the last free week of my job, at least paid vacation that is. Probably not until October so that it is cool again. A long time.

On other news: food. I have been eating no sugar (yeah, fruit is fine) and thus have been having more fat than usual. I even found mint chocolate chip ice cream! It is indeed ice and cream mostly, and tasty too. But that and the beloved eggs and such is very different from my usual diet. I don't think this is sustainable for me, and that's okay. It was a...I hate to use this term...washout from me needing bread and cereal. I am in control of what I eat and some of the cravings have hushed. Oh, do I still want a fresh and hot piece of bread with jam? Hell yes! But I think I could have one piece. One. Not four. Or just huff the bread like I did when I couldn't have gluten all those years ago (excess stress made my body react to all sorts of things). And no more Fruity Pebbles. Nuff said.

What is This?

 

 

What in the name of all that is cold and dreary is this stuff? Is it snow? Is it rain? Is is some hellish combination of it made up to lower the temperature in a hurry?

I have dubbed it snain. Neither rain nor snow. And thunder.

Overnight we failed to have the predicted inch or so of snow and massive winds, which is fine by me. Seeing that this meant the trails were dry, I decided to go out for a walk. It was not a very long walk because the incoming weather significantly dropped the temperature and, let's face it, I'm a wimp when it comes to cold, even when bundled up in a warm coat and gloves. But it did mean that I got moving today instead of being in complete sloth mode as was the expectation as of yesterday (and will probably be tomorrow). I didn't even make it around the shorter of the hikes and instead chose to cut that one in half--reference the wimping out.

I had good timing since after I got home it continued to get colder and eventually led to the snain shown above. It was nice looking out at it from the warm inside the cabin. Made me happy to have gotten out, but equally happy to have been home when it started.

The dog, at the first sound of thunder, decided that my feet were the place to lay or right against the couch if he couldn't reach the feet because they were on the couch. He's not terrified of thunder but he certainly is not a fan. But even without the weather he is in his spot by the couch with his head stuffed under the table so he can see out the window. Silly boi. And he's snoring again.

The eating is going well, though I have exhausted my stash of roasted nuts. I made a pig of myself on my bag of cashews last night and ate all that I had saved up for the next two days. I don't want to go out to the store so I am making the most of the food that I have here and carefully rationing so I don't have to go to the store.

On that. I did go into the grocery store to get said nuts and some veggies to make chicky shoup for dinner last night...and found "keto ice cream." It's mostly cream, as it turns out, and is really tasty. I got the mint chocolate chip and I am carefully rationing it, which isn't hard because dang is that stuff rich. Now if only I had rationed the cashews.

Bread. My Nemesis. Bwa Ha Ha!

 

This week I embarked on a trial run of a self-made diet to see if it can help with both my weight and my digestion woes that the lack of gallbladder has produced. Why? Because I am thirty pounds heavier than four months ago. 30.  I can pinpoint the reasons for that gain: white bread and cereal carbs, closely followed by apathy. My innards are less than pleased and problematic. Solution? Washout the cravings for butter and sugar bread and bowls upon bowls of cereal. 

First I am switching out regular milk for almond milk (I am using Califa Barista because it is awesome), nixing the bread, and kicking out all added sugars I can find. This includes condiments--who knew BBQ sauce had so much sugar! The sugar in my tea is now stevia drops, which I have used in the past and just got out of the habit because it has a different mouthfeel to sugar. I don't drink soda, except for the rare diet Dr. Pepper, so that is easy. For now I cut out dairy, other than cheese, since I tend to binge on it.

So for now I am loving the eggs, nuts, salads, and lean meats. And a few no sugar chocolate chips for the craving crushers. But, having said that, I am still eating fruit, so it is not a true keto diet, just low-carb and ultra-low added sugar. And tea, of course. Always the tea.

Is it sustainable? Not for me. Dairy will end up back in there, but probably not real milk to prevent the cereal binges (also getting rid of the cereal will help too!). But bread? That is sticky. I LOVE bread. And my mom makes some awesome homemade stuff that will be about the house out of my control. I will need to make peace with the fact that there will be that good stuff in my future, I just need to keep from devouring it all at one time, especially with butter and sugar on it. Other than that I am going to try to keep the bread to a minimum and if really necessary for some reason it will be whole grain.

This week is proving that I have a physical addiction to a large amount of carbs. So far my guts have been happy to oblige this change. No major incidents to speak of and less...um...unpleasantness. Still some there, but A: I am only two days in on this, and B: I got a LOT of exercise in, which may or may not have altered the system. Being a half hour from a grocery store is preventing me from chickening out and throwing in the carberific towel. (But it is there in case I mismanaged my food estimates.)

So now there are beets in the oven, waiting to be sprinkled with feta cheese and devoured. Interesting side-note. There was no cutting board in the cabin so I made do with the already-sad sheet pan as a board for the beets. A little more damage isn't going to cause any harm. I lined the pan with aluminum foil for easy cleanup anyway. 

Now off to check on lunch and then to troubleshoot my computer Windows update. Again. 

Also: I can't wait for that massage tomorrow after a little overdoing it the past two days.

What to do in the Mountains?

 

 

Happy Good Boy on a Break

Get moving! Day 2 of hiking and Link is once again zonked out on his couch after a hike and my feet are VERY confused. Yesterday after getting settled into the cabin I hopped on down (well...drove  fifteen minutes) down to the shorter of the two hikes, about 2 miles. I had two pairs of hiking boots to see which fit better before I went on the longer hike. The first pair was not the answer. So today I did the 3.5 mile beast (for me) of up and down in the smaller and newer of the boots. I found the answer! Except where the problems showed up from yesterday. Still a win.

So now I am dead. Given that it has been a while since I did a longer hike (I think today's was 3.5ish), I call this a success! I am, however, debating whether tomorrow's planned long-ish 4.5 mile hike is a good idea. Why shove all these hikes into such a short time? Snow/Rain. Coming in on Tuesday and continuing into Wednesday with snow overnight and rain during the day. Not ideal hiking weather in what becomes a muddy mess. I kid you not, there is a "Mud-O-Meter" at the start/end of trail. The last hike is liable to still have mud after last week's snow. We shall see if I am up to another longer hike (but it is mostly level walking instead of today's vertical shifting). There is no way I am managing that after some added moisture.

So what am I going to do with the rest of the vacation?

Be. Just Be. 

Oh, and a massage on Tuesday. The poor masseuse can de-knot all the hiking in an hour of what is going to be lots of sighing and purring on my end. Me. Netflix. Internet. Book. Tea. Open doors and a blanket to just enjoy the air. 

I'm trying a change in my diet this week, but I'll toss that up in a later post.

For now: puppy snores, carb withdrawal, and lots of tea.

How Many Changes Can I Cram Into One Week?

Let's see here, there's the new meds, there's the rug-pulling sugar cut, there's the hiking (in the mud I think). And hopefully sleep. The combo of meds and sugar-cutting should make for some interesting side-effects, but probably good for me in the long run. I know that the first day is the move-in day. Days 2-5 are all good things. Days 6 and 7 are worrying about going back to civilization. Day 8 is saying goodbye and all the depression that comes with it.

I have all my meals and snacks planned out as well as the hikes I would like to take and may or may not depending on situations out of my control. I am not taking sweets or ways to cook said sweets. I am even checking out a strange concoction called keto ketchup to see if I can save some sugar there as well since one of the nights is a hamburger patty. This diet isn't going to hold up at the parental units' house and is far from low-carb, just low-sugar, but I can at least follow it at my house when away from the landmine field of goodies.

And then there's mud. We got 6 inches of snow in the city, though it all was melted by the end of the day. I am not sure if I will be fighting the remnants of the white stuff on my hikes, especially since there is supposed to be a little more moisture later in the week. One thing to consider is that there are supposed to be highs of 70. If I am going to go on a long hike it is going to have to be on Sunday or Monday since there is more moisture predicted for the week after that. Even if I can't hike, I can still work on the last edit of my second book before I send it off for a full and paid edit. The ending needs work and it needs tightening up as well. Something to do when I am not outside enjoying the scenery!

I woke up several times last night to let the dog out since he had an upset tummy. Apparently those times interrupted my sleep enough that I was dead to the world in the morning. I woke up at my usual 6:45 and got ready for work, then realized that I couldn't drive to work safely. Had to call in and say that I would be in late because of it. Talk about embarrassing. 

Also got a chip in Loki's windshield. Right in front of the EyeSight lane-minder. That means whole new glass. At least after last time's replacement I lowered my deductible since that thing is ridiculously expensive. Some cars are chick magnets. Loki is a chip magnet.

Why We Stop?

 

This is one confused and wet dog wondering why we stopped and why I am looking at him through this weird brick thingie. He's my motivation to get out and move and see other places. Yes, the treadmill is great for getting myself off my rear and moving--something that is VERY necessary when at my house where it is not as safe to walk after dark than at my parents' place. Its problem is that I am not getting uneven terrain, even if I use the incline/decline features, and the great big scary outside is just strange and wonderous.

I did in fact change over my reservation for my trip to a place nearer real trails that are darn near impossible to get lost on, unlike the other place. With the weather being strange (it snowed 6" overnight) everything is probably going to be muddy, but it is supposed to be up to 70 on Sunday, so most of the snow will probably have melted by then. Muddy, but still doable. Who knows what the weather is going to do later in the week at this point. I am making sure to bring all the things I might need just in case I want it and don't have it. Granted, I am thirty minutes from a dreaded Wal-Fart, but I would rather not have to go that route.

My mission over the week food-wise: Nix the sugar. I have been living on sweets and white bread (often with butter and sugar) and it is time to nix that problem. A week of washout should be good for me. Lots of fruit, but that is fine. It will also make my wallet happier since I won't be eating out and have a full kitchen to keep me going. And a side note is that it is COVID safe!

I wonder how out of shape I have gotten over the last half a year. I will still try for the 5 mile trek and turn around if I have to...which knowing me I will be too stubborn to do. Good shoes, good buddy, good water storage (though this time I am bringing more just in case since I was running low last time by the time I got back to the truck), and hopefully a good time.

Great Timing, Dumbass

Now, picture the high desert: sand, scrub, cactus, blue sky. Lots of blue sky.

Except for yesterday.

No, yesterday I wanted to go for a walk. I checked outside and it seemed a bit cloudy and calm. Perfect for a hike. I get to my hike spot and the wind has picked up a smidge. No biggie. Wind is the usual and I have on wind resistant jacket and pants. I start getting spit upon by rain and call in to the mother to check the weather since my internet on my phone was being strange. "It looks fine. I'll see you later."

Well, while not "fine" it was not even particularly pleasant. I got about half-way around the circuit when the wind tore through and started with the sleet and rain. Luckily I had already turned away from the wind by the time that it really started up. The pants are indeed mostly water protectant, which I wasn't planning on testing at the time.

By the time the dog and I got back to the car we were tired, wet, and cold. Then temperature had dropped from 46 when I left the car to 34 when I got back in. (Heated seats are wonderful by the way). And now my car smells like wet dog. Totally worth it though.

Keto or Low-Carb. Discuss

Way back in 2012 when Jason was in end-stage cancer treatment we both went on a ketogenic diet--true keto with lots of MCT oil. I went bat-shit insane and had horrible gastric issues with it so I just modified it to be low-carb so I didn't have to make two meals. But now I am back 20 pounds up from where I was two months ago and I am desperate. I have been craving pure sugar and carbs and it is killing me.

Is it possible to have the benefits of a ketogenic diet with a low-carb version instead, or is it just not something that works right?

With my trip next week I can use it as a jumpstart to getting back to healthy eating again. I know that I need to exercise more, but I am wondering if I can alter my diet enough to make myself have better results than just calorie cutting and basic nutrient tracking.

One thing I am doing is switching to a plant-based milk so that I don't binge on cereal anymore. Moomilk (as I have dubbed it) is a major draw for me, whether in cereal or drunk with hot chocolate. By changing to plant milk I can have my tea with milk but not have the tendency to crash my healthy eating. Back when I was trying to figure out if I had milk intolerance/allergy I tried all the milks on the market, which had much less options at the time. Oat, rice, almond, hazelnut, coconut, soy. Done it. Hated it. Fast forward to today and I found what is dubbed a barista creamer style almond milk. Oh dear Lord, yum. It works wonderfully in my tea, has less calories than moomilk, and doesn't have the draw to eat with carbs of various types.Yeah, it's more expensive than moomilk, but I don't care. Now I just need to figure out if I have truly found the holy grail of plant milk, or if there are better ones out there even than this one. (For reference, this was Califa barista almond creamer).

This means that I am going though mugs of tea like...well...water. Which I guess is okay. One thing I even managed with a little caffeine hit was to get in some exercise. It wasn't much but it was good to get moving. Plotting out my hiking for next week may need to be altered with how sedentary I have been lately, so I am going to work myself up and see how it goes. No treadmill out there!

One Week.

 

Haggling, while rarely practiced anymore, can be a great thing! For a little more than the previously planned vacation I now have a spot that I know ahead of time near all the amenities needed. I should have asked for less because I didn't think to check the price, but so it goes. Everybody is happy.

Cabin. Woods. Relaxing. One week from tomorrow, after all wrap-up from our work event is complete, I will be hanging out at a cabin in the woods and enjoying myself being away from...most of everything. I do have internet, but no phone. I can be gotten a hold of, but people know mostly to leave me alone. And then there are the trails.

I like hiking. Day hikes, at least for now. The longest I have done was a little over 5 miles of up and down and left me dead, but oh so happy (and almost ran us out of water!). Fast forward to the last two months of inactivity. I am so done. I am so not here mentally. I need a break. I took two short hikes at two locations and did okay, but was definitely out of shape, but it felt good to get back outside. This is a photo of some of the cactus that we avoided on the trip. The dog was tired too after our 1-2 mile hikes, but not enough to need his ramp up into the car. Having said that, I have altered where I am going for my vacation to be nearer to designated hiking paths so I don't get my rear lost in the middle of nowhere. I'm hoping that there isn't snow on the trails, but it is supposed to be in the 50s and 60s, so it should be fine for hiking in the middle of the day without a problem. If there is, I'll deal as needed.

The two reasons that lead me to this second (known) spot is that it is comfortable for me and the dog and it is near hiking and trees. And it is beautiful. And well kempt. And quiet. Yeah. I like it, despite the skunk that tried to make himself known last time I was out there. I know that there are maintained trails at the preferred place. There may be a little mud/leftover snow in parts, but that is fine and I just plan for the extra time, warm things, and other needs. I am so done. I am so not here mentally. I need a break. 

So I'm officially taking the time off work to restart they healthy journey that I tossed to the wind these past two months. Less sugars, since I know that the biggest part of my eating habits that needs to change is how many simple sugars I eat. Not soda, thankfully, though that would be an easy one to deal with. No, this time it is sweet treats and basic (whole wheat and white) bread. I would kill for some bread and jam right now just thinking about food.

And what does that mean I will be eating? I have a giant list of me-approved foods for the journey along with some pitfall-reducing planning. If all goes to plan on the move of locations I will have a little harder time since there are food places galore within the surrounding 20 miles, those that are open in the shoulder season. I also am limiting my milk intake since it leads to massive amounts of cereal intake. I loathe most of the regular milk substitutes for moomilk (I'm especially looking at you, oatmilk), but I found a massively awesome barista version of Califa Almond Milk that is rich and great in tea but not good enough to use in cereal. Tweaking diets is difficult. Sometimes more that others.

Stroganoff with Noodles? Pfft. Keto Safe!

 

You know that stuff called stroganoff that you eat with noodles (or rice, you heathens)?  I have the holy grail of recipes now that doesn't even require starch to go with it. It makes those old canned soup varieties a thing of the past. You have to like shrooms though. And if you are on a low-carb or keto diet it fits in perfectly.

2 lbs sliced mushrooms
1 Tbs.oil
1 medium onion, diced medium-fine
2-3 (or 4 or 5) cloves of garlic, minced (or powder to taste)
1 Tbs. Better than Bouillon Beef (mixed with...)
1 c. water
1 lb small chunks/trips of beef or in my case venison
Salt and pepper
Sour Cream (light works just fine)

In a huge skillet cook down the mushrooms with oil until they are turning dark and no longer look raw at all. Add onions and cook till onions are translucent. Add water/bouillon and meat. Cook till meat is cooked through and tasty. Serve with sour cream. Devour.

I think I ate almost half the batch by myself. Oops. Given that there are twice as much shroom to meat ratio I don't think that's really a problem.

Reasons to Be Thankful

Even When Life is Really Rocky

I'm struggling a little right now. For various reasons my brains are deciding that now is a good time to go off the deep end. I am hoping that I can hold it together through the next two weeks until my vacation kicks in. This week is work's St. Patrick's Day Celebration and it is the biggest (and only) event of the year. In addition to the event we also have a newsletter hitting doorstops this week as well to up the donations. 

I will survive. 

One method that I am thinking about using is severely limiting my sugar intake. Not keto, since that threw my body into all sorts of hell the month I was on it with Jason. Just cutting out the extra sweets and added sugars that seep into EVERYTHING. Fruit? Fine. Milk? Not so sure, but probably fine. Ketchup? Not without some serious changes. Luckily, it is easy to find acceptable foods labeled with the keto category. I still haven't decided on when to start this, but probably over vacation so the first week of sugar-withdrawal is under controlled conditions with limited access to extra sweets and pastries to undo my progress.

I may not thrive over the next two weeks, but I will survive this just like in past years. Also like in past years I have the annual I-am-done-with-this-shit vacation following the event. Due to unforeseen circumstances my last vacation will probably have to be either me taking my tent out for a week or just chilling at home. Either works well for me and is better for my pocketbook. 

Speaking of tents, the campgrounds are open for the year! I need to gear up everything and get it triaged for spur-of-the-moment trips out where work can't reach me. And so that I at least have bear spray with me this time. Just because that seems prudent now that I know there are brave bears in the area. I think I may have already lost my camp kitchen table before I even had a chance to use it! Bah! I don't want to spend an additional hundred bucks for something that I won't use often since I am usually in developed campgrounds. But it irks me that I would lose something so quickly. That is what I get for not coating the black case in reflective tape!

And now I am going to sit back and take stock of what I have to be thankful for instead of wallowing in my own self-pity. Wallowing does no one good. Maybe 5 minutes of walking will lead to more.

Of Weight, Hikes, and Work

 My Turtle Made a Friend

I'm having a nice trip to Starbucks to write and take a break from TV, dog, and people who need things. I didn't go home this last weekend due to being needed at work. Also have a meeting tonight as well, but it is the last one for a while. I like being able to get out of the house again. Till the next wave. *Sigh* This is the new normal, as it were. 

I apparently have some miscommunication between my mouth, my feet, and my waistline. It's been almost three months of gaining weight. Now I am back up to 215 from a low of 195 those months ago. This sucks. On top of that I haven't had the willpower to get off my arse and exercise. The combination of too much/unhealthy food plus lack of movement are becoming my downfall. I am back in larger pants and having trouble with hikes again--though admittedly the last hike was far more strenuous than previous ones. And it's not just a case of laziness. I am having to drag myself out of bed and Get Stuff Done every day, so something has to give. In this case the food and exercise was what gave in.

Maybe Saturday's hike can be a kickstart for the near future. Or not. I don't know. What I do know is that I still am in a funk and not really into moving or doing anything other than eating. At least I am back on getting emailed/texted work done in a timely manner (read: instantly rather than a day or more later). My coworkers were worried about me--definitely time to reevaluate my mental state. But they are all very understanding and interested in getting me back up and running and back to my normal useful self.

Speaking of work, we have our 71st annual St. Patrick's Day (Corned Beef and Cabbage) Celebration of Faith and Service. No dinner this year, like in past years due to Covid. That means only a week and a half till the event and DUN da DAH! two and a half till my vacation, and boy will that be good. There are no vacations between late October and mid-March. Too much happens during that time and this year I am not dropping all of my vacation time at the very last minute like last year. (Shameless plug: gscnm.org) Knowing that if I need to duck out of work early I can at the last minute takes off a load of stress from my shoulders. I just need to not use that privilege too much and run myself into trouble. Yay for understanding bosses! 

And that is the update for the time being. The tea is all gone, as is the coffee cake. Yes. I go to a coffee shop to have tea. Bite me. For some reason it is easier to write with ambient noise that doesn't affect me and I can focus on just typing. 

 Till next time: What gets you motivated?

A Whole Lotta Up

 

My good boy reveling in a hike

Yesterday my mom noticed that I was restless, moody, and in more of a funk than even the most recent usual. She suggested I go on a hike since I'm now cleared to walk with Link again. Dog and I decided (because he has a say in this and wanted a longer car ride) to go across town to the opposite mountains. 

I should have known what I was in for with the twisty turny road to get to the trail. 

Up. Lots of up. 

I'm glad I had my CamelBak with me, but if I'm going to make this a habit I need to get a bigger reservoir to be safe on water for both of us. We got in 2.25 miles in up and back before the wind got bad later in the day. Link was a well-behaved boy and only shied away from the 6ft tall man in a hat with a walking stick. I kept getting asked what type of dog he was--a mutt. And a very good boy. 

We're both sore today after the scrambling over rocks. Even were up high enough to see leftover snow in the shade

This was the first time I'd been on a hike in two months. Maybe longer. And it felt good. I've gained twenty pounds in two months.

Maybe this can kickstart getting back into the groove of things.

Head, Meet Desk

Lately I have been making several mistakes at work, things that under normal situations I would never have made. The past two months have been like this. It coincides with the time leading up to and after surgery as well. Some of it is probably stress, as we have an annual event coming up later in the month, but that can't be all of it.

So I'm stressed. A lot. And it is affecting my performance at work enough that my boss offered me time off to deal with whatever I needed to do. I appreciate it, I really do, but it makes me nervous that it is that obvious that more than a little something is wrong.

Between rapid weight gain, slugness, and overall just not...me?...I am sick of this. I don't know how I lived for so long before like this, but something has got to give and I need it to be something quick.